Confessions of a tired being
at least in the end, one person has sorta got me. But even then i'm not sure. We rp the brutal stuff i want. And they seem interested sometimes. but reminding myself they're busy and not upset is hard.
wheni've been too high coming home i've been spiraling. I hear allthenames i go by. And then i hraear caorls name. But i'm not her. thats not my name.
Istill imagined it though. The fight. The worst ending. he calls me by her name to insult me. but i put my hands on his neck like her. I scream and beat at him for it like her. And when he's bloody andunre sponsive beneath my bloody fingers I sob like her.
But i'm nother. i'm barelyu strong enough to hurt myself let alone others.