If reality is what we percieve, how we define it is unique to us all-

god it doesn't make sense does it? then reality doesn't exist in an exact perception? hell.

I watch it through layers. Thin projector like visions over top what I look at. A daydream, constant dissasosiation- whatever you want to call it. Reality has shown me time and time again what will come for me, what to expect out of life. There is no chance in my life. There is gravitation. I can't percieve the world without having something to fade back on, something to put between me and the world. When I'm confronted with it, when my layers have been remvoed I break.

H: you are slipping between here and there

H: you cant stand the now without the otherv

H: you see images ontop of images, you cannot discern the reality from the false

G: so why wouldnt they both be be real?

G: why cant i discern one from the other when i think so deep on these things?

H: why cant you just enjoy the world as it is without daydreaming every step of your way?

why cant you enjoy the world with the rest of the people? why must it be at night?

H: You panic when confronted with now, with only one reality. You become terrified. And when you slip back to the other when it presses on you its own confrontation you face it willingly.

H: But your dreams are leading down, you're in the footsteps of darkness.

and the people beg you to reconsider

Elysium must not burn.

G: so what is there to do about it

H: you can go out and live in that hell your scared of

you could stay in this apartment, seclude yourself until a time

youve been mad along time

longer thenyou might have thought

how lonely are you now to talk to me here like this?

its a shame, really

Whats left for me outside fantasies i can escape to? They become so vivid I think i'll bleed or bruise, that they will manifest. I yearn for the door to be broken in and they come rushing to kill me. To break me down and send me off. I hope for someone to take me when I walk, leave my body where no one will find.

And thats one reality.

My dreams have been falling, collapsing in on itself. I know if i keep chasing Jack- If i let it continue to burn. Then i'll burn to. I will go with Elysium. The sanctuary ive built in my dreams to escape to will be gone. I will no where to escape to when I go mad. When I die. I want there to be nothing when I do, to have it all cease to be and I can rest in an empty nothingness.

If i let the dream win, if i fall into the escape and let myself believe the world will be what I make of it-

There would be more bodies then just mine.